Archive for November, 2008

You can’t afford me

November 22, 2008

I’m not lonely. I just sometimes would enjoy having something to do on Friday and Saturday nights besides work.

I don’t need a boyfriend, I don’t need to date. It’s so stupid. I don’t think they understand or accept me for who I am. Yes, I have a strong fondness for guys, you could almost call me boy-crazy, but that does not translate into everything I do. It’s one of those things, like if you talk about something a lot you end up not doing it, well it’s like that.

If anyone’s ever questioned it…I do love myself first. Who else would I? Just because I incorporate others into my life or am willing to, doesn’t mean I’ve lost myself.  Just because I am adult enough to show my feelings doesn’t mean I’m a doormat. I guess some people think so and that is fine, I cannot help what anyone thinks about me. I’m constantly evolving, so like it or leave it.

I just want stuff to wind down a bit.

Like people always question and I even used to question how do people do all this stuff without feelings attached, well I know it’s possible, because I now have no romantic feelings whatsoever. I know I used to, but really now, I don’t, and I’m not so sure how long this will last.


Ready, set, go!

November 17, 2008

Everything’s just balancing out now.

I’ve got an early morning interview for school.

At times I ask myself is all this paperwork and research worth it? Then I remind myself, I must go for everything and anything because no one else will do it for me.

I may change, but I’m always going to be me to the core. I’m very forgiving, that’s all I can say. I really am changing, because I have a lot of goals and want to do all the things I choose to go after.

Right now, I feel all my friends are off doing their own things whether or not we’re at the same school, and I’m wishing everyone well because I wish myself well, and God does provide.

I harbor no ill will, it’s all peace and love.