Archive for November, 2008

You can’t afford me

November 22, 2008

I’m not lonely. I just sometimes would enjoy having something to do on Friday and Saturday nights besides work.

I don’t need a boyfriend, I don’t need to date. It’s so stupid. I don’t think they understand or accept me for who I am. Yes, I have a strong fondness for guys, you could almost call me boy-crazy, but that does not translate into everything I do. It’s one of those things, like if you talk about something a lot you end up not doing it, well it’s like that.

If anyone’s ever questioned it…I do love myself first. Who else would I? Just because I incorporate others into my life or am willing to, doesn’t mean I’ve lost myself.  Just because I am adult enough to show my feelings doesn’t mean I’m a doormat. I guess some people think so and that is fine, I cannot help what anyone thinks about me. I’m constantly evolving, so like it or leave it.

I just want stuff to wind down a bit.

Like people always question and I even used to question how do people do all this stuff without feelings attached, well I know it’s possible, because I now have no romantic feelings whatsoever. I know I used to, but really now, I don’t, and I’m not so sure how long this will last.

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Ready, set, go!

November 17, 2008

Everything’s just balancing out now.

I’ve got an early morning interview for school.

At times I ask myself is all this paperwork and research worth it? Then I remind myself, I must go for everything and anything because no one else will do it for me.

I may change, but I’m always going to be me to the core. I’m very forgiving, that’s all I can say. I really am changing, because I have a lot of goals and want to do all the things I choose to go after.

Right now, I feel all my friends are off doing their own things whether or not we’re at the same school, and I’m wishing everyone well because I wish myself well, and God does provide.

I harbor no ill will, it’s all peace and love.